My 3 boys and I

May 13, 2008

Day Thirty:30 day husband/partner encouragement challenge

Filed under: 30 day husband/partner encouragement challenge — by my3boysandi @ 6:39 pm

“…This is my beloved, and this is my friend…”

Song of Solomon 5:16b

Friends can be completely honest with each other, but friendships are strained when

truth is not spoken in love. How are you speaking to your beloved? Are you so “used” to

him that you don’t appreciate the wonder of his friendship? That is your challenge today.

Is your sweetheart your best friend? Does he know this? Have you told him, or do you

assume he “just knows”?

Friendship is something that is cultivated through the good times and the bad. Friends

can share their hearts, but they don’t step on each other’s hearts.

The way to have and be a good friend is to cultivate and celebrate the relationship. As

you end this “30-Day Encouragement Challenge,” celebrate your friendship with your

husband. Get alone and reflect on your beloved friend. Write him a letter, listing the

qualities you admire and appreciate about him. If you are creative with words, write and

frame a poem about him.

Perhaps you can prepare a special meal, just for the two of you, and read the letter or

poem to him. Ask if you can pray for him, and if he is willing, thank God for your love

and friendship, asking for His blessing on your home.

Encouragement, as you have seen these past 30 days, is a synonym for love in action.

Mr Wonderful is not only wonderful he is my best friend 🙂

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May 12, 2008

Day Twenty-nine: 30 day husband/partner encouragement challenge

Filed under: 30 day husband/partner encouragement challenge — by my3boysandi @ 12:59 pm

“A prudent man foresees evil, and hides himself; the simple pass on, and are punished.”

Prov. 27:12

As you near the end of your Encouragement Challenge, take time to think about your husband’s responses to the wickedness of the culture, the media, etc. Does your husband recognize and avoid evil? Does he regularly turn his back on pornography, sexual temptations, and the urge to lie and cheat?

This is a valuable character trait. Like Joseph in the Old Testament, who fled from the wicked advances of Potiphar’s wife, this takes an understanding that these kinds of sins are first and foremost, sins against God (Gen. 39:9).

Praise your husband when he recognizes and turns his back on wickedness. If you can think of a circumstance where your husband stood for righteousness, remind him of that today-and express your gratitude.

Mr Wonderful often comments how bad New Zealand is becoming (for those who dont live here we are seeing more evil things happening in New Zealand but I still believe it is a far safer country than a lot are in the world). He is digusted in the evil things that are happening and sadden. He, himself lives a good honest life.

He doesnt like guns at all. He encourages the boys to play other games. We have began to use what I consider natural play and adapting it. For instance boys will boys and use their fingers or sticks as guns. However, we have said guns are not nice and play and pretend that their finger or stick is instead a hose and make the siren noise a fire engine does and a ‘swishing’ noise while moving our finger from side to side to pretend they are watering something usually one another or us and say “oh, now Im all wet.” Our Little man thinks this is very funny. He loves fire engines. In turn we are avoiding something that has the potential to be evil.

Mr Wonderful is not in the least bit interested in pornography. He thinks those that are are sick. Nor does he lie or cheat. He was brought up by good parents whom taught him that these things are wrong. Bless Mum and Dad W.

Thank you Mr Wonderful for the wonderful man you are. I love you.

May 11, 2008

Day Twenty-eight: 30 day husband/partner encouragement challenge

Filed under: 30 day husband/partner encouragement challenge — by my3boysandi @ 1:13 pm

“The fear of the LORD is the instruction of wisdom, and before honor is humility.” Prov.

15:33

Sometimes, when we just “know” we are right and our husbands are wrong, it takes

great humility to honor them. It is difficult to speak well of our husbands when our own

hearts are puffed up with pride.

As part of your Encouragement Challenge today, pray that you will respond to the Lord

in faith and humility before you react to your husband. Speak wisely and well, and leave

the results to God.

The humility that comes from a right relationship with God – the humility that comes

when a man is willing to listen to God and be taught from His Word – is indeed a

beautiful quality. Jesus was an example of this kind of humility when he was willing to

submit to His Father’s will (John 6:38; Matt. 26:39).

Does your husband have that kind of humility? Is he willing to learn from and submit to

direction from the Lord? Let your husband know how precious this is to your marriage

relationship.

I pray each and every day that one day Mr Wonderful know the Lord

May 9, 2008

Day Twenty-seven: 30 day husband/partner encouragement challenge

Filed under: 30 day husband/partner encouragement challenge — by my3boysandi @ 8:08 am

“Be of good courage, and he shall strengthen your heart, all you who hope in the

LORD.” Ps. 31:24

You have almost completed the “30-Day Encouragement Challenge.” Perhaps it has

taken you a tremendous amount of courage to speak words of encouragement

consistently to your husband. Courage comes as we place our trust in God. Have faith

that God will continue to work long after your encouraging words have been shared.

There are lots of “tough guys” in the world, but true courage comes from the Lord. Does

your husband exhibit the courage to take an unpopular stand, perhaps even to stand

alone against evil? Is he courageous in his faith? Does he work hard to change

injustice? Is he a stickler for the truth? Does he protect you or your family from the

attacks of the Enemy?

Psalm 27:14 says this kind of courage comes from “waiting” on the Lord for His

strength. If your budget allows, “award” your husband with a medal, trophy, framed

picture of a brave knight, or some other token that represents his courage as a man of

God. Praise evidences of your husband’s courage in protecting you, your marriage, your

family, or your home.

Mr Wonderful is a brave man. He stands up for what he believes. He is a stickler for the truth. He hates lies.

He is my hero

May 8, 2008

Day 26 – 30 day husband/partner encouragement challenge

Filed under: 30 day husband/partner encouragement challenge — by my3boysandi @ 11:24 am

“And Jesus increased in wisdom and stature, and in favor with God and men.” Luke

2:52

If you have faithfully encouraged your husband, you will no doubt have seen some

changes in his life…and your own life, as well. Encouragement is a wonderful habit that

we hope you will continue for the rest of your life.

The important thing is to keep growing in Christ and obeying the Word of God as you

respond to your husband. As you consider today how to bless your husband and not

tear him down, think of ways that you can encourage balance in your home.

Jesus led a balanced life. He grew mentally, physically, spiritually, and socially. As you

see your husband branching out in these areas, is there a pattern of growth? Is your

husband striving for balance in his life? If so, let him know you have noticed, and ask

how you can further encourage that balance.

If your husband is out of balance – focusing on one area to the exclusion of the others –

consider whether there are things you can do to help restore or create balance in his

life. Can you encourage times for sports or exercise? Keep the children quiet for a study

time? Invite friends over for dinner? Stimulate his mind?

Be sure you are working toward balance in your own life, as well. Be an example!

I believe that some people are called to Christ through the way they see you living your own life.  As well as praying for Mr Wonderfuls salvation.  I try to live as Jesus would want me to in the hope that one day Mr Wonderful will get saved.

We should invite people for dinner more often.  That is something I must try to work on.

I try to keep the boys out of the study when Mr Wonderful is trying to work in there.

May 7, 2008

Day Twenty-five: 30 day husband/partner encouragement challenge

Filed under: 30 day husband/partner encouragement challenge — by my3boysandi @ 8:54 am

“…seek peace, and pursue it.” Ps. 34:14b

“You will keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on You, because he trusts in

You.” Is. 26:3

Before you consider whether these verses describe your husband, consider your own

presence in the home. Do you promote an atmosphere of peace, or do critical words

often flow from your mouth? Do you struggle with anger? If so, before you continue with

your Encouragement Challenge, confess these sinful habits to the Lord, and determine

to speak words of peace to your family today.

Does your husband bring an atmosphere of peace into your home? Is his presence a

calming influence? Does he bring music, entertainment, books or people into your home

that build a sense of serenity? Let him know how much you appreciate this wonderful

quality, and support his choices.

If, on the other hand, he is quickly angered or he creates chaos rather than calm, ask

God to give you an abundance of the kind of peace that will speak to his heart. Be

patient and loving. Create an inviting atmosphere of peace, as much as possible.

Mr Wonderful is a peaceful and loving man and I am blessed by him

May 6, 2008

Day Twenty-four: 30 day husband encouragement challenge

Filed under: 30 day husband/partner encouragement challenge — by my3boysandi @ 8:23 am

“And you, fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the

training and admonition of the Lord.” Eph. 6:4

Children can be quite a challenge to the marriage relationship. A wise wife will support

her husband’s leadership in the home as much as possible, and will praise him for his

fathering skills. Negativity makes a man feel like a failure, and may make him to want to

give up.

Does your husband discipline your children wisely? Does he show them love and

encourage them? Does he take an interest in their activities and dreams? Does he

spend time with them? Does he take part in developing their character? Praise him for

these important life skills.

If you don’t have children – is your husband positive and encouraging around other

people’s children? Let him know that you have noticed.

If your husband does not experience positive relationships with children, you will need

to figure out why. Perhaps he had negative experiences as a child with his own parents,

and needs to learn how to respond. Perhaps you can lovingly and patiently show him

how to parent – while still maintaining his authority in the home.

I try to support Mr Wonderful’s leadership in our home.  This is hard as I have done all the parenting on my own over the last 14 years or so (with a brief break while I lived with My Home Schoolers dad – and he was abusive).  I have learnt it is much better to talk to Mr Wonderful privately if I disagree with anything.

I think Mr Wonderful is wonderful with children.

Mr Wonderful does love both our boys.  Sometimes we disagree about discipline but we talk about it in private. He is always keen to chat to Our Home Schooler about the things hes learning and the things hes involved in. He has popped in play group with our toddler sometimes.  He likes to see what he has done for art at play group.  He loves to have “chats” with Our Little Man.  He is involved in raising both our boys.  He thinks Our Home Schooler should be more responsible.  He treats the boys differently.  However, I guess they are very different.  One is 12 and one is 2 after all.  One is his biological son and one is stepson.

Mr Wonderful was treated very firmly as a child.  It has taken a long time for his father and him to get on well.  Mr Wonderfuls dad is a really great man, whom I get on well with however he was harder on Mr Wonderful than he was on Mr Wonderful’s sisters.  I think this is probably a common occurance.  I remind my self when he is a bit hard on Our Home Schooler of this fact.

Overall I think I am very blessed.

May 5, 2008

Day Twenty-three: 30 day husband/partner encouragement challenge

Filed under: 30 day husband/partner encouragement challenge — by my3boysandi @ 8:05 am

“Let your speech always be with grace…” Col. 4:6a

You’re moving toward the home stretch of your 30-day challenge! Just a reminder of

what you’ve committed:

“You can’t say anything negative about your husband… to your husband…or to anyone

else, about your husband. “Each day, say something that you admire or appreciate

about your husband…to your husband…and to someone else, about your husband!

“In all things showing yourself to be a pattern of good works…” Titus 2:7a

Does the “30-Day Encouragement Challenge” seem like hard work? Or is it becoming a

pleasant exercise in genuine Christ-likeness in your home? You are only scratching the

surface of ways to encourage your mate.

Is your husband organized? Is he diligent? Is he persistent? These are all related to a

pattern of personal disciplines that are worthy of your praise. Affirm him for one or more

of these traits that you see in him.

Some men have not developed these qualities because they are naturally more

spontaneous. You can praise his spontaneity! Perhaps God has called you alongside to

help him with disciplines he has not yet developed – but this does not include nagging.

You can keep him organized.

Whatever the need, you can be your husband’s cheerleader, encouraging him when he

wants to give up.

Go Mr Wonderful Go

Mr Wonderful is quite an organized person.  He likes to be punctual.  This is something I have always admired in men.

He is patient and persists in helping others. He is diligent and likes to do a good job.

May 4, 2008

Day Twenty-two: 30 day husband/partner encouragement challenge

Filed under: 30 day husband/partner encouragement challenge — by my3boysandi @ 9:25 am

“Let your speech always be with grace…” Col. 4:6a

Focus today on how you represent your husband in your home, your church, and your

community. In this challenge to encourage, ask: “If all my family and friends knew about

my husband came from a filter of what I’ve said about him, what would they think of my

husband?” Do you need to change the filter?

Do you talk positively about your husband to others… or do you complain and criticize?

Your speech should reflect 1 Cor. 13 love. Your words should be kind, and should never

“rejoice in iniquity” (v. 6). Refrain from listing your husband’s faults to others. Satan likes

to trick us in this area – be wary of sharing barbed “prayer requests.”

Remember, “Love will cover a multitude of sins” (1 Pet. 4:8b). Present your husband

before others today in a strong, positive manner. Slip in a “good word” for your spouse.

Resist the urge to correct or belittle him in front of others. Some of what you say may

come back to him – and you want your words to be sweet, building him up and never

tearing him down.

Don’t forget: you are always criticizing – or encouraging – before an audience. God hears

your conversations when you are alone with your husband in your own home. May your

speech be always seasoned with grace.

While you are considering how your speech can reflect the grace of the Lord in your

husband’s life, don’t forget that your words can also encourage others. When you share

what God is doing in your life through this “30-Day Encouragement Challenge”, others

will be blessed. Perhaps other wives will be moved to take up this challenge.

Today being still sick I stayed home while Mr Wonderful took the boys to church with him. I pray they all get something out of it. Praise Mr Wonderful for taking the boys with him.

Today Im also praying for James and Daniel 2 more hubbys of ladies I know who are doing (or thinking of doing) this challenge

May 3, 2008

Day Twenty-one: 30 day husband/partner encouragement challenge

Filed under: 30 day husband/partner encouragement challenge — by my3boysandi @ 8:45 am

“But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be

added to you.” Matt. 6:33

If we are living in light of eternity, everything we think, do or say is seen from an eternal

perspective. We will someday give an account for our failure to speak words of love and

encouragement. Determine today that your words will be sweet and helpful.

Does your husband have an eternal perspective that allows him to reject materialism

and temporal values? Express your gratefulness for his value system, and praise him

for putting eternal things before riches and other things of this world.

If this is a problem area for him, consider how you might alter your own value system

and live for eternity in front of him, encouraging him to do the same. Only two things will

go into eternity…the Word of God and people. Be sure that you are focusing on the right

things.

Im praying for Mr Wonderful. I pray for a lot of my family who dont know Christ. I always remember that its not too late until their last breath.

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